Homewrecker

A few months ago, a guy started hanging out in my yard. He'd just stand there and stare for hours. I knew he was trouble. I even called my landlady and warned her, "This might become a problem." She replied, "Okay, but just keep me posted. I've never had anything like that happen before, and I'm not sure what to do." I knew what I had to do, I just didn't want to do it. But finally I decided it had gone too far and if I allowed it to continue, someone might get hurt.

So I let the dogs out.

Now, depending on your habitual tendencies, you might be coming to various conclusions about what this is all about.

Here's a clue :


Once Spring sprang, birds began flying all over the neighborhood looking for nesting sites. The large deck that overhangs my yard has a wide beam underneath. There's a particularly sweet spot right in the center that's nicely sheltered from rain. A male robin began scouting it out by sitting on my fence and just staring at it. For hours. Every day. He'd fly to it and sit there, then fly back to the same spot on the fence and stare at it.

(I understand this behavior. Anyone who's ever gone shoe shopping with me will never do it again. I'll try on the same pair over and over, then the same shoe in the same size, then another size, etc.... Sometimes I just sit there and stare at the shoe, too. Once I find a shoe that fits, I don't buy another pair of shoes until it is totally worn out. Even I can't stand myself.)

When I realized he was casing the place for a nest, I was thrilled. Then I realized the nest wouldn't be far from my door and not that high above where the dogs play outside. The dogs can't reach the nest, but their running around would definitely startle a mama bird off her eggs. I figured my coming and going would be enough to make him change his mind.

No. After about a week, he brought his wife to check out the 'hood. They flew back and forth, sat and stared, examined it from other angles. All day long for several days. I know nothing about robins, but I never would have guessed they were that picky.

About two weeks into this, I woke up and saw long pieces of dried grass hanging over the beam. They'd been hard at work since dawn. When they returned, she stood on the fence with her beak full of fluffy dried grass, looking like she was holding a pom-pom. I knew it was my last chance to take action. That's when I let the dogs out to play. The two birds watched at a safe distance. She held onto the pom-pom. It was heartbreaking. They had worked so hard, made so many plans. It took a long time to convince them to go. They couldn't relinquish it. I kept the dogs outside until the defeated pair finally flew away. Over the next few days I let the dogs spend more time in the yard. Bit by bit the long pieces of grass left hanging over the beam were stolen by other birds.

But then I let my guard down. Well, sort of. I spent a few days in the hospital, and when I got out I discovered that the persistent couple had taken advantage of my time away : the nest was complete.

Thankfully, she hadn't laid eggs in it. I stepped up my efforts of making the area undesirable for a young avian family. Not only did I let the dogs out more, but I spent more time out there brushing them and cutting their nails. After a few days, the birds gave up and never returned.

Their little nest is still there. I have mixed feelings when I look at it--I miss the babies that never got to use it, yet I know I did the right thing, albeit the difficult thing.

A few days ago, a small songbird began sitting on the fence and staring at the nest. I just hope he doesn't show up with a realtor.